OK. So, I do my best knowing the things that I know to make sound and healthy choices for my family. I try to look at the overall picture and gauge the impact that any one choice may have on my own family or the welfare of those around us. However, a slight glitch must exist in this well intentioned plan of mine.
Here are my confessions…
I adore with wholehearted and unabated compassion Cadbury Mini Eggs. The bag before me says it is Family Size, unfortunately I don’t think it is referring to me and my unborn child but alas I have consumed every morsel. I have forced myself to read the ingredient label and it is as followed:
INGREDIENTS: milk chocolate (sugar; milk; cocoa butter; chocolate; lactose; soy lecithin; PGPR, emulsifier; artificial and natural flavors); sugar; contains 2% or less of: cornstarch; gum acacia; artificial color (yellow 6 lake; blue 2 lake; yellow 5; blue 2; red 40); ethyl vanillin, artificial flavor.
Yeah, yeah, blah, blah, roughly translated it is a bag full of chemical crap. Logically I know this. However, there appears to be a communication gap between the intelligent side of my brain and the “I don’t give a crap, give it to me now” part of my brain. So I continue on popping one chemically laden mini-egg into my mouth one after another, all the while drowning out that obnoxious voice in my head that yells “hypocrite!”
Not a very distant second in line comes my love for Lucky Charms. A definite contraband item in my home. I hide the box behind my pots and pans and sneak out a bowl at night when my daughter is sleeping. I can’t decide when I am at the check-out if I feel worse because the checker thinks I’m letting my three-year-old eat this crap or if I would be more embarrassed for them to know that the entire box is just for me. Even more ironic? I eat my bowl of Lucky Charms bathed in raw milk. Luckily I made my husband promise me that he wouldn’t allow me to buy another box for fear that this baby will come out a rainbow of marshmellowy colors.
I prefer the taste of Kraft Macaroni & Cheese over homemade macaroni & cheese or even the organic Annie’s brand that I allow my daughter to eat. I think I would still prefer a grilled cheese sandwich made with white bread and a Kraft processed cheese slice rather than the 12 grain bread and the Tilamook or raw cheese that I make my family eat now.
Far too much TV gets played in this house. Way too much. My daughter (when two) counted more accurately to ten in Spanish than in English thanks to good ol’ Dora. I actually hate the TV and would be fine without having one and yet somehow, someway, I am persuaded on a daily basis by a tiny little girl that she must watch cartoons. I know I should say “no” but alas, it just doesn’t seem to happen.
So those are my confessions. I am not proud of them but hey, I’m not anywhere near saying “never again” either. I am working on deprogramming my taste-buds and deprogramming my daughter from a world full of animated Spanish speaking creatures but it is not an easy task. Am I the only one out there?